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A Sad Ending

The Mother
One night while I was dining out with a cousin, my brother Francis called to tell me our mother has breast cancer. A few days after that, my daddy called to tell me the same thing but he wanted more than to just bring me the news. He wanted me to take the first step to patch up the mess between my mother and I.

Daddy said my mother is going back to the US and might not be able to come back anymore because of her illness. Because of this, both of them told me I should make amends before shes gone.

I dont know the severity of her health condition but I have thought of this scenario before. I already cried at the thought of her passing but I got through it. When she cast me out to save Grace, she was already dead to me.

Now that the reality of her passing away is at hand, I really dont care anymore. Nonetheless, I am open to the idea of a reconciliation.

Remember when I told you about the time when I was at the lowest point in my life and I was looking for a reset button? I did not find one, but with this situation there is an opportunity to restart things. All the bad things can still be undone, remedied.

So I told daddy and Francis that to undo the wrong, they must make Grace admit her deceit and make her return everything she stole from Michael and Gina. Only then can we talk about reconciliation. I cannot have peace of mind until the people who did me wrong made things right again. I also told my daddy that I am not the person to talk to if he wants to reunite the family. I was not the one who did the unthinkable.

When they told me about my mothers cancer, they sounded like they were telling me its about time I should change. I was not the one who cheated. I was not the one who stole someone elses money and belongings. I did not create this mess. I was merely a victim of some peoples greediness. So what I am saying is, I am not the guilty party and I am not the one who needs to change.

I may be wrong in casting away my own mother. I may be wrong for being so unforgiving. But guess what? I am not perfect; I have flaws and weaknesses too. My conscience, however, is clear. I did not take advantage of anybody. If Grace cannot do the right thing for her mother and I cannot accept them for who they are, whos at fault? Nobodys doing any effort to correct the wrong. Nobodys asking for forgiveness. So, I am not changing my stand.

One of my friends told me I should not get my mother involved with the mess that Grace created. It is not true to say that. Yes, it was Grace who cheated and stole from Michael but there were plenty of them who supported her. When my mother condoned and protected Grace, she is as guilty as her. She does not want Grace to look bad so she deliberately told relatives and friends a different version of the story. That is unacceptable for me.

A friend told me I am not God. I cannot make things happen the way I want it to. I cannot change people. Under the same tone, I am also saying this is me. I do not expect many of you will agree with me. I imagine most of you will say otherwise. Please respect my opinion if I am hard as a rock.

I may be faulted for being unforgiving, but I still feel bad for being considered the most at fault in a situation wherein I was the victim. The word hate is not enough to describe what I dealt with. I know that eventually I must forgive, and I wish I could now do so for I do not like the situation I'm in.

If it is Gods will that I should change, He will make things happen.